You Had a Bad Day

Yesterday was NOT a good day foodwise. I didn't eat breakfast, I didn't eat lunch, and I hardly ate anything at dinner. I went out to dinner with my son and his father and we decided that we were going to go to Texas Roadhouse. As much as I wanted some of that bread with cinnamon butter, I didn't eat it because I knew it would equal a lot of points. The problem was that I hadn't eaten anything so I should have had it because I needed to eat 41 points! I stayed away though, but it was difficult. I also stayed away from my usual dinner choice of ribs because they tend to be fatty and I knew that would rack up the points as well. Yet again, I should have just eaten it. I ordered a chicken breast with BBQ sauce on the side, mashed potatoes, and fresh veggies. I only ate half of the chicken, didn't put a ton of BBQ on it, had 3/4 of the mashed potatoes, and ate a few carrots and that's it.

I was so hungry when we went out but yet I didn't even get halfway through my meal. I know it sounds dumb, but I think it is because of this app that I have. I downloaded an app where you listen to a track before you go to bed, it's called Lose Weight. It is supposed to use hypnosis to stop you from overindulging in food. As crazy as it sounds, I have not eaten anywhere near the amount of food that I would have normally. Even if it's healthy food, I don't eat that much. I really can't tell if it is the app working or just my mindset that I should be portioning my food, but either way, it is working.

I was set on making today a better day but I still have yet to eat breakfast so it's not going well so far. I am going to have to make something and have a really late breakfast. I will be making a chicken casserole tonight for supper but it's not going to be worth many points so I have to eat something for breakfast and have to eat a good lunch too, or have some snacks. It will take time to find that balance I am sure.

Some Sacrifices Must Be Made

Yesterday my son wanted to go to Friendly's for supper. He had been pretty well-behaved for the day and has been doing well in school, so why not? Well, I was sad to find out that I will no longer be eating at Friendly's. There was not a single thing on the menu that I could have without using some serious points. It just wasn't worth it to me. He ate while I gazed longingly at his grilled cheese. Sacrifices have to be made for the end goal, that is just how it's going to have to be.

We got home and I still had 26 points left for the day but it was late and I didn't want to eat anything too packed with sodium or carbs, but I had to eat at least 16 more points to be considered in a "healthy eating zone" for the day. I got a turkey sub with mustard, no mayo, and homemade potato chips with no salt. I didn't eat many of the chips because I didn't want to eat too many carbs, and I picked off some of the bread too. It wasn't the best and not really what I should have eaten that late at night, but I had to eat something. Ended up with 9 points left for the day.

My goal going forward is to make sure that I eat the bulk of my points for breakfast and lunch so I can have a light dinner. I find that I lose more when I don't have a lot of carbs or salt after 4pm so I am going to try and stick to that (except for tonight when there is beer involved). For breakfast this morning I had a few pieces of chicken and some strawberries, worth 0 points. I am going out to lunch and will be having drinks later tonight so I want to make sure I conserve my points.

There is definitely a learning curve with this lifestyle, but so far I am down 10.9 pounds and have lost some of my hips, so I know it's working. I just need to make sure that I stick with it. I also need to find some new things to eat for breakfast because eggs every single morning is getting old quickly.

It's Been...a Day

I have had kind of an off day today. I think it is just the weather. Cold and gloomy. I actually remembered to eat breakfast this morning though, so that is a plus. I wasn't super hungry around lunchtime so I made a shake instead of food. Ended the night with a turkey sandwich, Cheez Its, and a Skinny Cow ice cream bar. Still have 10 points left for the day.

I really don't have a whole lot to say tonight. I honestly don't know why I am bothering with a blog post...Just feeling listless today because of a few different things. I will feel better about myself one day, I hope, but for now, it's hard to when I feel invisible.

Sorry to bring everyone down. I think I need to hit the hay.

Under-eating and Overheating

I did not do well today. I wasn't able to fall asleep until 4:45am. I am not sure why, probably because it is so hot. I don't sleep well in the heat. I was woken up at quarter to seven by the kiddo, and then again at 8:30 by the cats and that was that. I forgot about breakfast because I was so tired. We had to go out and run some errands and by that time it was already 10am. We did the errands we had to do and then came back home for lunch. I had a bowl of fruit and some shredded chicken which amounted to a whopping 0 points. I had an iced coffee from Dunkins with skim milk, raspberry, and mocha, but that still only came to 6 points.

I didn't drink much water today either, only about 32 ounces. I had a vow renewal to photograph, so we went and did that. I almost passed out on the way back to the car because it was just too hot out and I didn't hydrate properly. My blood sugar was probably at rock bottom too at that point. So I sat in the car for a bit with the AC to cool down. I had 36 points to use for the day so I decided we would go to Cracker Barrel for supper since all I would have at home was a salad that was worth maybe 5 points. I still made sure that I tracked what I ate and that I was conscious of what I was putting in my body.

I ordered the Apple Cranberry BBQ grilled chicken with mashed potatoes and a bowl of fruit. The chicken was 3 points because I only ate half, the mashed potatoes were 3 because I only ate half, the fruit is 0 points. Only 6 points added...still 30 to go. Crap. I ate a biscuit and that added another 7 and had half of a cornbread, which was 3. Okay, another 10 points, only 20 to go. Good thing Cody wanted dessert. We got this campfire Smores thing and it looked delicious but I didn't want to go overboard. We each ate a quarter of it and then I packed the other half to go. I still have 13 points left for the day.

I was going to have some peanut butter or something as a snack but I am not feeling all that well because of the heat, so I guess I am going to end my day under points. Oh well. Tomorrow is another day. At least I didn't go over so badly that I used a bunch of weekly points too. I am glad that tomorrow will be cooler so that I will feel a little better. Tonight is going to be a challenge for sleep even though I am exhausted, it's 88 degrees in my room right now. I have an ice pack on my neck, the fan going, and both windows open so hopefully some air will start circulating through soon. Tomorrow I am going to make sure that I eat breakfast so I don't have to scramble to try and eat points at the end of the day. I will make sure to drink a lot more water too.

Stumbling is all a part of the process! On the plus side I am 19 days soda-free and I don't miss it one bit.

I hope everyone is staying cool

First Official Weigh-In Day!

Today was my first official weigh-in day with Weight Watchers. I am down 5.8 pounds so far! I am excited but I am trying not to expect that much every week because I know that I won't lose that all the time. It's a great start though and great motivation to keep going.

When I went to the grocery store today I had one objective in mind..stay on the outside of the aisles, nothing from the center aisles. I actually did pretty well with that. I bought fruits, veggies, chicken, ham for the kiddo, salad fixins, skim milk, and a crap ton of sugar free/fat free pudding that I am going to make a ton of delicious shakes with. I stayed away from processed foods. I didn't even look at anything with sugar. I think the worst thing that I bought was the Skinny Cow ice cream bars (and even those are only 5 or 6 points each). It was expensive, but it will be worth it in the long run.

I don't know that I would really call today a "cheat" day as I still made sure that I didn't go too far over my points, but I decided to treat myself. I had a few more points at breakfast than normal because I had three slices of American cheese with my omelette/sandwich. I didn't have lunch, wasn't really hungry, and then for dinner we had pizza. Even then I still had a few points left. I didn't eat anything else today but I did have a couple of beers when I went out to karaoke.

I bought a bathing suit (Ugh) today so that I can take a couple of water aerobics classes that they have at the Y. I am going to see if Cody will do them with me, but at least if he doesn't want to they have the Kid Zone so I can go to class and he can go hang out with some kids in the meantime. I used to do water aerobics with my mother when I was younger and I thought it was lame because I was a sullen teenager, but I now know how great the resistance in the water is for building muscle and burning calories. Plus, it is soooooo much easier on your joints which is one of the reasons I am choosing to do it.

I am keeping my fingers crossed that I can maintain this lifestyle without giving up yet again. I have so many "whys" that are pushing me to do this and to continue this for life. So many "whys".

I hope that everyone has a great three day weekend!

Help! I Need More Points!

I am finding it very difficult to consume the amount of points that they want me to eat per day. This morning I had an egg sandwich with cheese and then an egg on the side. For lunch I had a salad. For dessert after lunch I made a shake. For supper I had chicken, egg noodles, with a little pasta sauce and cheese. I still had 10 points left!! They like you to be within five for the day. I didn't feel like eating 2 sugar free pudding cups and wasn't feeling peanut butter, so I had a cupcake. Was it worth the 9 points? Nope. I am not even a big fan of cupcakes. Am I going to feel guilty? Nope, I am still under my points for the day by 1 point.

Tomorrow is my first official weigh-in. I am not going to expect too much because I know that 1-2 pounds per week is all you should be expecting, but I tend to weigh myself every day so I know that so far I have lost 4.2 pounds. Tomorrow I will see as to whether that has changed at all, but even if I gain a point today, I have still lost for the week! I am going to look at the positives.

That is about all I have for today. Pretty low-key day filled with the same foods that I had the day before with a few exceptions. I have 56 weekly points to use on top of the 42 daily points for tomorrow and we just may have pizza for supper. I am going to be very careful NOT to over-indulge so that I don't get off track, but man have I been craving some pizza.

Good night everyone!

A Treat to Eat!

I needed to eat more today. After I logged my breakfast, lunch, and dinner, I still had 18 points left for the day. They tell you that you should eat your points and even give you a blue dot on your log if you come within 5 points left without going over by a ton. This blue dot signifies that you are within a healthy calorie range for the day. Breakfast was 8 points, lunch was 5, and dinner was 8. I have 42 daily points to use at this point and 52 weekly points. I still haven't touched the weeklies as I have not gone over my points for the day yet. So I was left with 18 points after meals were logged. I made a small shake this morning which you may have seen on my Facebook. It was delicious but it was only four points, so I still needed to find some points somewhere. I couldn't end my day with 17 points left.



It was time for a treat. No sugar-free, no low fat. Just a yummy treat. I got a kiddie size so that I didn't have the danger of over-indulging. I only ended up eating half of it and am still four points short for the day, but that is better than 17.

I also started a journey to get moving more. I joined the YMCA with my son so that we could go get some activity together. We went to play a little tennis today. I had to be very careful because of my shoulder (torn tendons and cartilidge), but it was fun and Cody had a good time. Normally it's so hard to get him out of the house and away from his videos and Youtubing, but he was actually excited to go and said that the Y sounded like fun. He did great!

So today I am feeling great. I stayed within my points and even had a yummy treat, got some exercise in, and introduced my son to a new activity. #Winning

Going Out to Eat - Thankful for the Tools I Have

Happy Taco Tuesday! That's right, it's that magical time of week when we get to eat tacos because the day of the week starts with the same letter as tacos. I promised Cody that is what we would have for supper tonight, but that also meant trying to figure out what to eat because beef can come with quite a few points depending on how it's prepared. I was thankful for the Weight Watchers app tonight for sure. They have an extensive list of restaurants and they show the points for almost every menu item. I was able to find out that I could have chicken soft tacos fresco at Taco Bell and they were only three points each. So that is what I ordered.

Fresco means that they take out everything that is dairy and replace it with pico de gallo. So there was chicken, lettuce, and pico, plus the taco sauce that I added. I will say this, they were nowhere near as good as the Naked Chicken Chalupa that I REALLY wanted. They weren't as good as regular tacos and I would take the extra few points to have cheese. But they were the better option and I don't feel guilty for eating them for dinner. It is nice to have the information at my fingertips if I do want to go out to eat to make sure that I don't go overboard with points. It is quite helpful. I have not been going out to eat as much lately as I am trying really hard to stay at home and eat healthy which has been saving me a lot of stress and money.

I made a delicious salad (I know, do those two words really go together?!) for lunch today and portioned it out so I can have it for the next two days as well. The strawberry poppyseed dressing that I used was only 1 point and was actually really delicious.

I have been attempting to drink more water through the day as I hardly ever drink liquids. My friend Liz gets on me about it every time she sees me. I cut out soda and have been soda free for 15 days now. Honestly, I don't really miss it. I only drank diet, but that still isn't great for you so I decided to stop drinking it. I have a goal of 60 ounces of water per day which is still less than I should be drinking per day, but it is so much more than I usually have. Baby steps. I have been doing pretty well so far, have met my water intake goal for the last four days. Sunday night I had over 100 ounces of water at the club. That was a little too much. Lol.

My weigh-in day is Friday. I am hoping to have lost 5 pounds by then but even if I stop at what I have already lost this week (3.4 pounds so far), I am not going to get discouraged. Healthy weight loss is around 2 pounds per week so I am still doing well.

I hope everyone had a great day today!

Weight Watchers, a New Journey to a New Me?

Hi everyone! Thanks for reading :) I will try and keep these posts short and sweet but sometimes I ramble.

As you can see from the past posts in this blog and from my Facebook, I have tried and failed, tried and failed, and tried and failed again at trying to live a healthier lifestyle. Why is this time different? It's not honestly. I have the same motivations that I had before. I may fail like I have before. I will have to get back up and dust it off. I need to do this. I am not getting any younger or any healthier.

I have always been heavy. I don't remember a time when I didn't have extra weight on me, even as a kid. I was tortured in school for being an overweight nerd. As you can imagine that leads to a lifetime of low self-esteem, depression, and more weight gain. Coupled with the oh so wonderful disorder called Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, I have continued to gain more and more weight through the years. It really spiked after the birth of my son. I think I had post-partum depression but never got it diagnosed. Things spiraled out of control and I ended up over 100 pounds heavier in just a year. My marriage ended and that caused me to spiral even further. So now here I am, weighing 160 pounds more than before I got pregnant. Even then I wasn't at a super healthy weight. I have tried so many times to find something that worked for me to help me lose weight but I always get in my own way or life throws me a curveball that I cannot recover from.

I have said I am ready for this so many times and it has always ended in disaster. So this time I am going to say that I am going to give it the old college try and see where it goes. I joined Weight Watchers the other day after being inspired by one of my friends who has lost 56 pounds since October. The new plan that they have is so much easier to follow, or I am hoping it is. I am sure I will slip at one time or another. I still love pizza, tacos, and ice cream. There is no way around that. I just have to try and portion control my guilt foods. Deprivation never works. Moderation does.

So far I have been cooking healthy dishes for the last three days and drinking a lot more water than I usually do. Exercise will be introduced later, but I really want to get this food plan down first. I have lost 3.4 pounds over the course of three days and I am excited to see what my weigh-in on Friday will be. I am going to try not to weigh myself until then (I tend to weigh myself every day). I will share recipes and photos on the Facebook page that brought you here.

So, yeah...I rambled. I knew it would happen. If you are still reading, thanks!